At age 29 I was rocked by news that would forever change my life.
I stood with my wife in our kitchen and tried to understand what it meant when a little plastic OTC device said the word “pregnant.” Many new dads describe a sensation of fear that overcomes them. I felt like the world stopped as a stream of different emotions flowed together in a split second.
Three weeks prior to that day, my wife’s doctor explained to us that her womb had issues that would need to be resolved before any baby could be a resident. He said that we were looking at a minimum of 2.5 years before we could even consider getting pregnant! Yet, despite all of his medical confidence that she would not be able to get pregnant, the little stick test was clearly positive.
My wife was instantly consumed with guilt that we had recklessly created a life that was doomed. I saw the grief in her eyes and, even though she was absolutely right, I did not feel fearful or panicked. We both found solace in the faith that God opens a womb and if there was a baby in her belly, he or she was absolutely meant to be there.
So, what now? How am I supposed to feel about this new life change? I was overjoyed by the idea of having a little buddy, but my first internal thoughts were:
“How are we going to continue living our lives and doing the things that we love to do? How do we travel and see the world? How do we grow our business into the envisioned empire that will allow us to go/do/buy/explore as we please?”
The next nine months we nothing short of a miracle. Doctors declared my wife to be “High Risk” and warned that she would have many complications while carrying the baby. They said she would not make it to her due date and would need a C-section that she did not want. I was writhing with a mix of both joy and fear of the unknown, all while trying to practice my spiritual surrender of knowing that all would be ok. Faith in God goes a long way. My wife had a perfect pregnancy and natural delivery with zero complications; she was amazing. The baby liked his home so much that he stayed in there to bake for an extra week and we tried to literally dance him out on her due date….seriously, here is the video:
The day my son, Julian, was born, that sense of emotional uncertainty all withered away as I starred into the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. He was perfect and I wanted to spend every moment I could with him. Nothing else mattered because I was hooked on being his dad.
I think a lot of dads out there have similar experiences to mine. Though everyone’s individual events and children will vary greatly, the overwhelming awesomeness of being a Dad in universal. There is no right way to parent; there is just the way that life brings to your current situation. Love is the only language that your new baby will understand for quite some time. If you have the intention of offering your child all the love you can give, then you will be the parent you want to be, you will have the child that you want to have and you will have the life that you want to have without any sacrifices.
Dadgenuity is the name that I have given to my efforts as a new, first-time dad. My wife and I have poured love into our son and he has blossomed as an amazing little light. Together, we have endured many tough situations and figured out the ways to enjoy adult life with a little one. This blog is intended to offer some ideas, inspirations, and even a few inventions that have helped me on my journey. It is my intention to help other new dads out there so that more families can be whole and the relationship between mother and father that sparked the family flame can keep breathing with life and love.
YOU are enough to be a great dad. You have more to offer that little life than you could ever understand, so start loving and just enjoy the journey of being a dad.
Author: Josh W. Fritz