I want to be honest with you about this month … it’s been extremely challenging. A super tough time for me mentally, physically, and emotionally. Every month for six months, I’ve been writing and recording guided meditation prayers and sending them to you … but this month I didn’t have it in me. It’s hard to admit that but I had to be honest with myself, and you, on what I can and can’t give.
I paid attention to my inner dialogue and I was upset that I was potentially letting you down. But I ultimately decided not to push myself to record and to instead give myself patience and understanding vs discipline.
There are lots of things changing in my life. I can feel myself being stretched like never before. Even when there’s good stuff happening and big shifts, there can be lots of uncertainties that try to throw you off track.
Back in the spring of 2017, I was going through similar feelings when we knew it was time to leave Savannah but we didn’t have a plan or an Airstream yet. During a call with my beloved Rev. Dale, I broke down into tears almost immediately after saying hello. He listened to my heart ache and confusion of why things felt so hard when I was trying to do something good for my family. He introduced me to a metaphysical term called chemicalization.
In a nutshell, as you’re changing for the better, there’s a chemical reaction happening in your brain as you make the positive changes. Your small self is fighting to hang on to the old ways while your next level self is knocking on the door.
Have you ever been there? You’re doing your best to do something positive, yet so many things show up to distract and discourage you? You question if it’s worth it.
That’s why so many people quit right before the big breakthrough happens — it takes a brave heart to answer the call, to follow your dream, to change yourself for the better.
One person I use for inspiration is actress Chrissy Metz. When she got the call from NBC’s This Is Us, she had less than a dollar in her bank account. Chrissy was working odd jobs, living on Ramen noodles from the Dollar Tree and seriously close to quitting acting all together.
Can you imagine if she’d quit?!
We can see how close she was to the goldmine of success she was about to hit, but at the time the struggle was real and she thankfully chose to hang in there, even when the glimmer of hope wasn’t dazzling too brightly.
Instead of a guided meditation, I offer my encouragement.
Don’t quit. Whatever you’re going through will pass soon. Be courageous, trust your gut, and know all is well. If you’re getting tested, you must be really close to breaking through to something amazing! It’s all worth it. Hang in there and know you aren’t alone. WE got this.
Sending you love and tight hugs,